Vin Diesel’s Wall of Pants

Vin Diesel awoke. His mighty senses informed him it was time to rise and once more stun the world with his physical acting prowess. The handmade satin sheets clung to his godlike frame as he rose and viewed himself admiringly in his floor to ceiling diamante mirrors.

“Hmm, what will Vin Diesel wear today?” he rumbled, his awesome basso profundo voice vibrating the air about him causing his reflection to shimmer like a mirage. “Activate the Vin Diesel pantswall.’ The mirrored wall shimmered once more and lo its glory was before him and he was pleased for it was good.

These are pants fit for Vin Diesel, bring them to me.” he boomed. Vin Diesel flexed the mighty muscle of his mind and by the sheer power of his incredible will the pants came into spontaneous being. “Vin Diesel will wear these pants today,” said Vin Diesel.

And with a word he was. He laughed out loud. Vin Diesel does not put his pants on one leg at a time for he is not like other men. Vin Diesel paused and then spoke to the air again. “Tell the President I will be there momentarily, I have a rogue African state to deal with first.” Vin Diesel smiled to himself, the pants were snug, truly today was a good day to be Vin Diesel. And then just like that, he was gone.

(The links above contain images that may blind and disturb you deeply. Gentlemen click them at your peril, ladies brace yourselves. There will be both music and pants fit for Vin Diesel.)

Via the everlovin’ BoingBoing

12 Responses to “Vin Diesel’s Wall of Pants”

  1. Arsela Undress Says:

    they’re not man pants!
    THESE are man pants:
    http://www.manties.net/

  2. Gurrier Says:

    By God they look comfy too. But I submit that they are not fit to garb the nether regions of a man of such superhuman virility as Vin Diesel. Look at this poor chap here he looks like they’ve pierced his bollocks just to keep the damn things on. http://www.vizeau.com/e24.htm

  3. Is Says:

    The internet is a wrong place.
    I think it just broke me.

  4. Arsela Undress Says:

    mudder a jaysus, first thing in the morning too. cheers.

  5. Gurrier Says:

    Its a public service blog this.

  6. Arsela Undress Says:

    http://www.vizeau.com/v125.htm

    I’m blind now.

  7. Gurrier Says:

    Sweet mother of God my blog has turned into some kind of gay pants site. Its dirty and its all my fault. Curse you Vin Diesel!

  8. evilgrin Says:

    argh….for the first time in my life I’m actually hoping they put some clothes on a guy…..slightly ill……

  9. The Gin Lady Says:

    That ass crack is now imprinted on my brain. I shouldn’t have looked at it before my morning coffee.

  10. Gurrier Says:

    That’s it I’m closing this thread. No more manbums please.

  11. Arsela Undress Says:

    Ha! you started it.

  12. I Bring Nothing To The Table » Blog Archive » Astounding information. Says:

    [...] ;m surprised too. He was in that Fast and the Furious, where he came off a poor second to Vin Diesel, which should tell you pretty much where he ranks on the talent chain. And [...]

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